Entitlement, How You Know It’s True & Drake’s Equation
by Xenia Marie Ross Viray
A Mythical Message
Image by Pete Hillman : A Plume Moth (Our animal guide for April)
ENTITLEMENT, HOW YOU KNOW IT'S THE TRUTH & THE DRAKE EQUATION
I was raised in a household in which work was prioritized above all else: above health, personal fulfillment and all other relationships. This idea is not unique to my family, and is more like the water we swim in collectively, especially if we come from immigrant families.
Because this pattern is so deeply ingrained in me as the default setting in my body and unconscious, taking a day off has always felt unnatural to me, and when I was very young, it felt out of the question. So when I had jobs I didn't like from which I needed a break, I would make myself physically sick so I could take the day to lie down… without any guilt.
It was nice to have the rest without the guilt, but had I felt like I had any agency over my life, my choices, and how I treated myself, maybe there would have been room for ways to rest that I chose… maybe even ways that felt pleasurable.
In my family of origin, the only time we rested was when we were depleted. It was as if any energy we had was owed to something outside of us to produce something. Obviously, this was because of our labor economy & capitalism's cultural norms, but this default also became a way of coping with an extreme amount of grief and loss that felt impossible to bear. The loss of home, the loss of loved ones, the loss of connection to land, to ancestral ways, to cultural connections, to our spirits and selves.
To wonder if you liked your work was entitled and irrelevant. To feel the tiredness of your body was moot information. Since it was assumed that nothing could be changed, that our patterns around work were just the way of the world, our unconscious logic was: why know about a need that can't be met?
We were protecting ourselves from our own grief.
And accepting what is and making the best of it has always been a gift of mine, one handed down by my lineage. But sometimes this acceptance is no longer healthy or honest and my soul has a way of showing me when this is the case.
THIS STORY IS UNIVERSAL
Even if you are not a first generation immigrant, the extractive production-obsessed culture we live in is laden with grief. This grief comes from an unspoken agreement many of us make: survival is more important than our hopes, our dreams, our healing, and living life the way we want to. In other words, we can't live, we just have to survive.
No matter how many elders have said that they rarely wish they had worked a little more, the collective nervous system seems to be set to fight or flight, because exhausted people are easier to manipulate, and to be exhausted is just so normal. And because it seems there is an atrocity being committed everyday, and we are all inherently connected, perhaps this exhaustion makes sense.
But, I have noticed…
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When we see someone take care of themselves or go after a far-fetched dream, we automatically think this person must be different from us. That they were born into money, (and that somehow that negates all of their human trials and tribulations, which is another illusion created by capitalism), that they have some superhuman quality, or that their families gave them such unconditional support that it was easy for them to create their lives.
And the circumstances we are born into matter. They obviously do. But all you have to do see that life is driven by more than the condition of our births is pay attention to siblings and see how they approach life so uniquely despite being raised in identical soil. *The contents of our lives are not dictated by the individual, nor are they simply a product of the collective… We are one, and we are individuated. Negotiating where these truths intersect is the work of being human.
LIFE IS FULL OF CHOICES
In 2024, so many people do not have a choice about using or wielding their voice or their power. Their actual survival is threatened. So I believe that treating our privilege of having a voice, having agency, having the ability to find what is authentic to us is our responsibility. I also believe - (and this is a very nuanced take that not everyone will agree with) that part of this is actually telling the truth that is your truth. Not a rehashing of a story you inherited from someone else, or a fantasy of what success is authored by capitalism's one-note mind… but the real truth from your heart.
You will know its true, because it will be a little scarier to share than the other things you have shared.
You will know its true because there is no one out there to validate it outside of you.
You know it is true because sharing it feels like being naked in the world.
You will now it is true because you share it for no other reason than it hurts not to.
It is this kind of truth that is connected to the gift we are here to give to the world. It is this kind of generosity that changes culture, timelines and lives.
One particular truth: it is often the small purposeful steps taken consistently that create lasting shifts, not the flashy splashy external moments or the appearance of your wishes - (though those are nice, too.)
I am a big believer in miracles, but I don't think we are here just to pray for them. I think we are to be them.
THE DRAKE EQUATION
In an article about The Drake Equation on wikipedia, it states "Harvard University astronomy professor Harlow Shapley speculated on the number of inhabited planets in the universe, saying “The universe has 10 million, million, million suns (10 followed by 18 zeros) similar to our own. One in a million has planets around it. Only one in a million million has the right combination of chemicals, temperature, water, days and nights to support planetary life as we know it.”
Instead of waiting for a miracle to happen, know you are the miracle. Your existence is the achievement. If your soul decided to incarnate, you've already taken the gamble of being alive. So what makes you feel like you are living? Start there.
Group Immersion has 3 spots left. Closes on Thursday 4/4.
If you have a deep desire to be the miracle you are, to help bring new systems, ideas, and art forms into the world with your authentic creative energy, but you are tired of doing it alone, feeling stuck or finding yourself in analysis paralysis, join me for Imaginal Temple Group Immersion. There are 3 spots left. Registration is open until April 4th.
OTHER WAYS TO WORK WITH ME IN APRIL
IN PERSON : FIELD OF THE RESONANT HEART:
April 6th : 2 PM in NYC
During these incredibly intense times of Mercury Retrograde and the Libra Aries eclipses of March and April 2024, we are receiving a higher voltage of energy into our systems. Some of us might be experiencing this physically, others of us may find our mind’s are very active in ways that aren’t always helpful. Join Lisa of Middle Sister Tarot and I to explore how the heart is a metaphysical portal to transmute the energies of the now.
Garden of the Imaginal is an accessible space to receive teachings, musings, private podcasts and opportunities to receive mini readings with me!
Join in April to be automatically be entered to receive a gifted 1:1 45-minute reading!
1:1 Readings are currently closed.
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